In actuality, things are always complicated in my family. No good deed goes unpunished, as they say. Trying to be the parent you want to be does not always equal being the parent your child needs. Helping Stretch and wife move into a new apartment led to moving him again, and yet again before the baby arrived. The teenager decided to go full-blown James Dean, i.e. Rebel without a Clue. The business suffered a major set back with the sluggish economy, but struggles on as more of a time-sucking, demanding hobby that occasionally produces sales. I branched out into a second business venture, one with less overhead and greater returns.
Fall was a whirlwind of more than falling leaves. The family finances took a wonderful leap for the better (Thank God). Lots of drama, soap opera style, manifested in my life. There were school issues, health issues, and big decisions. We managed to gather all five living generations for a photo shoot, compliments of my fantastic first cousin. As the holidays grew near, I realized it may be our last for such photos. It's been three years since my grandfather passed. My grandmother still shares her stories with a touch of sadness, and each Christmas has gotten successively harder for her without him. They were together more than 60 years, through two wars and five children. He stood over the casket of first a grandson, a daughter-in-law, then a son, before he left us. Words cannot express how much he is dearly missed.
Grandma D has been the glue that binds this large, eccentric family together. In their golden years, she hosted EVERY family gathering with a style and grace all her own. Grandpa's failing health stole that from her, from us all, to be honest. Being the oldest grandchild, and growing up the closest to them, I have a unique bond and cherished memories that define my childhood. Several failed attempts lead me to believe that her children are not capable of picking up where she left off. I'm not certain any of them actually want to try to fill those shoes, not that they ever could. The drama divides them exponentially as the years go by, it seems. It saddens me to know that my children have lost such a wonderful tradition, but I accept that the torch must be passed.
The face of a new generation inspires me. All is not lost, so long as the wonder and magic of family traditions survive. "Be the change you want to see in the world." Thank you, Diane Sawyer. In the wee hours of the morning, in my commonly insomniac state, I realize that I am the grandmother now. It's my turn to host the family events with a style and grace all my own. So in the year to come, I shall be the glue that binds my family together. No matter how tenuous the hold, even if we have to split shifts to achieve it, we will gather. Holidays will be marked by togetherness, not gifts. Memories have far greater value than plastic toys ever will. Martha Stewart, I am not. But I do love her magazines, and a few of her holiday recipes often find themselves on my table.
2011 will mark the return of my favorite traditions, come hell or high water! Baking great Grandma D's homemade bread from scratch. The Easter egg hunt and family barbecue. The 4th of July at the lake. Camping at Road Atlanta. The whole Thanksgiving circus, from the giant meal to Black Friday, and wrapped gifts under the tree Saturday morning. Christmas morning with all my boys together. And for 2012, I declare there's going to be travel again! The Grand Canyon and Daytona Beach with the in-laws, and maybe New York City with the girls. Definitely a trip to Disney World with the grandkids. I better start saving now, I guess.
Lift your glasses and toast with me:
"Here's to the end of 2010, and all the bad luck and negativity that came with it."
"Here's to our many blessings, may they continue and multiply."
"Here's to our health, happiness, prosperity and peace in 2011." But above all...
"Here's to you, the friends, family and fans that make my world a wonderful place to be! Happy New Year!!!"
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